Redemption V

The morning was bright and cool. School had just started a month ago after a hot and sticky Summer. Jake Cutter had spent his vacation at the lake with his friends camping, swimming and staying out late listening to music and watching concerts at the Civic center. Sammy, his best friend, well he was to more than a best friend. He hadn't admitted it to him but, since the first day they met in junior high, Jake was deeply in love with Sammy Morris. He had prayed and prayed for Sammy to notice, but really he was scared of what he might think if he found out his best friend was gay. Yes, he said it again to himself. He was gay. He was gay and there wasn't a girl in Harmon High that could ever change that no matter how hard they tried. Don't get me wrong, he had good friends and some of them were girls. He even loved a few of them like Hannah and Sarah. But not that way. They were friends and that's all they will ever be. Sammy was different. He wasn't like any of the others. Male or female. Since the day they met, Sammy treated Jake with respect and kindness. It was funny really. What he really did was save his life.
It was three years ago. Jake and his family had just moved to Harmon Maine. His father had been sent to the Bank as its new President from Little Falls New Jersey. Jake at the time wasn't speaking to his parents. He loved where they had lived and he didn't want to leave his friends. When they told him about the move, he asked. No, he begged them to let him stay with his Grandparents. But they said no and packed him up and they were off to Harmon. For Jake, it had been a quiet and lonely ride. His parents talked and sang as they drove, but Jake never said a word. Not to either of them. He was still to upset about the move.
They left Jersey on a Friday morning. The drive had taken them four hours. That included traffic and a stop for lunch. as they pulled into Harmon, they stopped at a gas station and got directions to Main street where Dad's bank was. From the Bank, it was another half an hour to the new house.
As his parents unloaded their things from the car, Jake sat in the back seat with his arms crossed. He didn't help with any of their things. He just sat there brooding. He got no dinner and he slept there with nothing but his coat to keep him warm. The next morning, his Mom came out with his breakfast.
"Good morning Jake."
"Good morning." He said coldly as he sat up.
"We have to talk." She passed him the plate and a glass of milk. He tried to push it away, "EAT!!"
He took the fork from her and started on the eggs.
"You surprise me, Jake. I always thought you were smart and fair. Your honest and I thought you loved your Dad and I. But lately I'm disappointed in you. I realize you liked it back in Jersey and you wanted to stay, but that wasn't possible. Your our son and where we go, you go. You'll get to go back and visit. You can stay there all next summer if you want. But this is home now. This is our home and you better get used to it."
Jake put down the fork and looked away. He knew he was being selfish. But he didn't want to be here.
"Do you have any idea how upset your father?" She asked. "Do you care?"
"Yes of course I care."
"That's not how I see it." She frowned at him. "He works very hard to give us this life. You have never gone hungry and you ALWAYS got your clothes new. New sneakers, new stereo, new MP3 player and the PlayStation. What about your laptop? So far you've had 3. Do you know how much they cost? Is this how you thank us?"
"No," Jake said. He knew his parents deserved a lot better than the ways he's been treating them. "I'm sorry."
"I'm not the one you should be apologizing too." She got out of the car and slammed the door behind her. "When your Dad gets home, you will apologize. You will not let him see a second of discomfort in your eyes. You will show him how much you love and appreciate him. Now you sit here and think about how lucky you are. When your ready, you get up to your room and put your things away."
That night when his father got home, Jake was sitting on the front steps waiting for him. Father pulled into the garage and stepped out of the car. The second Jake saw him, he ran out and grabbed him and cried.
"Don't cry." He said. "Everything is going to be OK."
As tears welled up in his eyes, his father never felt so loved in his life. Jake pulled away and looked up into his eyes.
"I'm sorry," Jake said. "I hurt you and I didn't mean to. I was just so mad."
"We moved here to make a better life for us all." He said. "There will be so much you'll be able to do here. You'll make new friends. You'll get to camp and swim. We'll be happy here."
"I know Dad." Jake smiled at him. He was right. Things would be different here.

That Monday morning, Father to Jake to his first day in the new school. It wasn't a bad day. There were eight periods per day. He had English, math, gym, and science every day. History was 3 days a week. Shop class was on Thursdays and Friday. Lunch fifth period and study hall was his last class of the day.
During homeroom, Jake sat across from a tall blond kid with the most handsome smile. He introduced himself as Sammy Morris. He was on the football team and the track team. As the day went on, Jake saw him in 3 more of his classes including lunch. They didn't talk that much in school that day. Not until the incident after school.

As Jake walked up Hamilton Ave, the blond kid Sammy was on his mind. He wondered what he meant by he would see him after school. He wasn't in his study class and he didn't run into him out it the yard. Jake did look for him, that was the day he met Hannah. She walked him to the park but had to turn off on Sherman. The home was three more blocks north of Lexington Ave.
\All Jake could think about was Sammy's deep blue eyes. Jake had been lost in them for all of the third period. During lunch, Sammy asked Jake something about his Little Falls High shirt he was wearing. Jake had mumbled something back but he really didn't remember what. What he did remember was his smile and how it felt when he touched him. Jake had gotten all warm all over. There was one more thing. Jake got hard as a rock when Sammy put his hands on his shoulders. Not only did he get a hard-on, but the touch also sent chills all through his body.
Yeah, he was gay and I guess he was in love for the first time. But how dd Sammy feel? Did he get the chills too? Did he like when he touched Jake? Sammy did have a huge smile on his face. Maybe he liked it too.
Just then, Jake heard something behind him. Could it be Sammy? With a smile on his face, Jake turned around.
"Well, well well." The dark-haired Latino boy said. "Look what we have here. It's the new kid."
Jake swallowed then took a step back and ran right into another one of the gang. As the boy put up his hands he pushed Jake into the center of the ring of gang members. There were eight surrounding Jake and pushing him from one to the next. Juan the leaders, laughed as he pulled a switchblade from his pocket and started cleaning his nails.
"I think its time we got to know you a little better." Juan reached out and grabbed Jake by his jacket. "Whoa!! Looka here boys. It looks like he's glad to see us."
Juan spun him around and stuck his hand down in Jakes jeans and grabbed his cock. The gang laughed not realizing how good it felt to Jake to have him stroking his cock. Though he was scared, what this boy was doing fulled Jake's body with excitement. Sweat poured off of Jake as Juan unbuttoned his pants and pushed them down, Jake fell back almost paralyzed in fear. He looked at Juan's gang smiling and rubbing the bulge in their pants. They knew when Juan was finished, it would be their turn.
As Jake trembled, two members stepped up and helped Juan bend him over. Still laughing, Juan undid his pants and stepped out of them and pushed his way up between Jakes' legs. As Juan pushed in, Jake screaming out in pain. For a second, he blacked out wishing he was anywhere but here getting raped. As the pain banged away at his bottom, Jake heard a yell as he fell down on the ground. Then he felt someone pick him up and helped him to what felt like the back seat of a car. As fear rattled around in his head, Jake pushed himself back thinking the gang had him set for the next round. Scared, Jake opened his eyes and there was Sammy holding him in his arms trying to comfort him.
"Shhh!!" He said as he rocked Jake softly. "It's over and they won't hurt you ever again."
As Jake looked Sammy in his eyes, tears welled up and he started to cry. He looked down at himself and saw he was covered with a blanket. His pants and underwear lay there at his feet. With his face buried in Sammy's chest, Jake tried to push the memories of what happened away from him. But how could he forget? The pain in his bottom wouldn't let him forget. As Sammy stroked at his hair, he bent over and kissed Jake on his forehead.
"It's over." He whispered. "I'll take you home so we can call the police."
"No!!" Jake said weakly. "I don't what my parents to see me like this."
"Then where do you want to go?"
"I don't know." He cried. "I want to die!"
"No Jake," Sammy said. "I just met you. I can't lose you."
Jake laid back and let Sammy hold him and slowly rock him. His chest smelled so good and clean. He could feel Sammy's heart pounding as they rocked. Being here with him felt right. He never wanted him to let him go.
"There's no one at my house," Sammy said. "We can go there."
"OK."
Sammy wrapped him in the blanket and told him to hang on to the seat belts. Then he climbed out of the car and went and hopped into the drives seat, As he started the car, the engine roared in life. Slowly Sammy drove the six blocks and pulled the car into his garage. Parked he pushed the button to close the garage door and went back to help Jake into the house.
As Sammy laid Jake down in his bed, he opened his eyes and looked around. Sports figures hung in posters on the wall. There was a desk with a laptop and speakers in the four corners of the room. An electric guitar sat on a stand next to a small portable amp. Sammy's bed was king sized with blue sheets and blankets to match.
As Jake lay there, memories of the rape flashed through his mind. The pain and humiliation burned deep in his heart. Though he loved Sammy, he could barely look at him. The shame of being raped and used by the gang tore at his soul. How could he ever face Sammy again? He had seen him laying there with that bastard on top of him ramming his cock in and out of Jake hole. There was only one way that he could clean that shit from his mind.
Jake sat up and listened for Sammy. He was somewhere downstairs fixing a cup of tea for Jake. Standing up, he turned and made his way to the Morris bathroom. The house was really nice with lace drapes all in a light blue tone. The bathroom was done in soft blue tiles. Jake open the medicine chest and rummaged though looking for something that would end his problem.
He found Metropolol and Atorvastatin. One was for the heart and the other was for high blood pressure. Neither of them would do. He dug in some more. The next shelf had just what he was looking for. Pain killers. There was a bottle of Oxicoton. Sammy's father had fallen and hurt his back. The doctor had to order something serious for pain.
Jake stared at the bottle in his hand. These would do. Then would put him down and keep him sleeping while the drugs did their work.
As Jake twisted the top open and poured the pills in his hand, the down opened and Sammy came in with a cup of coffee. He looked in at Jake and dropped the coffee.
"What are you doing?" He asked as he pushed his way in. He grabbed the pill bottle from Jake's hand looking at him with fury in his eyes. "How in the hell do you think this would help?"
"It'll stop me from thinking about what happened." Jake said as he reached how the pills. "Besides, this is my life. I'm sorry you had to see what happened, but  I have to figure out how to deal with it. Not you, and not my parents."
"Yes." Sammy said. "You have to figure out how to deal with it, but you don't have to be alone. You have people that love and care for you.Your mother, your father and.......me."
As the room spun around and around, Jake squeezed the pill bottle in his hand until it cracked, then he dropped it. His ears were ringing and his eye were slightly blurred. Sammy had just said something, but Jake wasn't sure if he heard what he thought he heard. What he thought he heard was impossible. Sammy couldn't have said what he thought, could he? Was Jake's mind hearing just what he thought? Was he going crazy? He turned away from Sammy and walked to the window and opened it up. If he dived out. he would land head first and that would stop all the confusion. He would be dead and he wouldn't have to deal with all this plan
As his leg lifted to the window ledge, Sammy leaped forward and dragged him away from the window.
In his mind a voice whispered something that soothed his mixed up mind.
[That's twice he caught you and saved your life. Don't say your sorry, this was not your fault. You don't need to be sorry. What will it take to convince you of his love? Doesn't it feel right when he holds you? Don't you see the sparkle of love when you look into his eyes? Listen to his heart, what do you hear?]
"Please don't go." Sammy said as tears ran down his face. "Now that I've found you, I can't lose you. Not now, not ever. My heart is your's and I can't live without you. Give me your heart and I will protect it with my life. I love you Jake. I love you now and for the rest of my life."
Suddenly all the confusion was gone and bells were ringing out loud and clear. Jake smiled and looked up into Sammy's eyes.
"I am and always will be yours Sammy Morris." Jake kissed him deeply. "And I will never let you go."                                                                                                                                                         

Sparks

I could sing of love long past in days of old.
Or I could tell a new tale of a bright new day.
I could cry about the loneliness deep in my heart
Or  I could tell you about a handsome lad in a French cafe.
I could talk of two eyes that meet in a park.
and the way they're hearts beat until
they finally touch and sparks fly.
It's all about love, its all about pain.
its all about tears and how I cry in the rain.

A lonely dream.

As the day turns into night.
I lay here all alone. 
Wondering how it went wrong.
Did I speak out too soon?
Did I ask for too much?
Did ask for the Sun 
But only gave you the moon ?
As the stars burn so bright.
My heart seeks a ride.
Away from this rock.
To find a new home.
On a star out there somewhere.
Where love is understood.
You know it has no real limit.
Be it, man or woman.

Why is I love so hard to say?

There's a song in my head.

And a tear in my eye.

For the words that we said.

It was all another lie.

Winter smiles.

I hope you had a very merry Christmas

I hope it was bright and happy. 

I hope there was jingle bells 

and bright happy smiles and delicious smells.

Toys and games for everyone. 

Bright lights flash from the sun.

A walk down to the mistltow.

Love and laughter for you all.

Once out dancing in the evening snow. 

Watching snow piles as they grow.

Hot rum cidar and a warm sweet kiss.

Happy smiles turn to bliss.

Walking home arm in arm.

He'll protect me from all harm.

Happy smiles from me to you.

Joyus wishes, yes its true.
No more tears, sadness set aside.
No more fear, we'll turn the tide.

A winters dance out in the snow.
We'll watch it pile, we'll see it grow.
His arms are warm and sweet are his kiss.
Happy smile from us.

Mrs Johnson's poem.

Here's a memory from 3rd grade. Mrs Johnson taught me this poem and I always remember it so clearly.

One bright morning in the middle of the night.
Two dead boys got up to fight.
A deaf policeman heard the noise and shot
and killed those two dead boys.

Redemption VI

The day was September 12, nothing really special was going on. Jeff Tamber was out somewhere he wasn't supposed to. He was driving down Mercy Avenue looking for someone he knew that he could buy an 8-ball from. It had been a really stressful week. His boss ragged on him again about the update of the Pillenger file. It was going to be late again and Cole Taylor would put it all on him even though it had been all Cole's fault. If he had been at his desk working instead of screwing his secretary in the ladies room, the report could have been done. Jeff thought he should tell the CEO everything, including why his wife disappeared from the last Christmas party. He thought about ratting Cole out, but with his luck, the boss wouldn't believe it and give Cole a promotion and me a pink slip.
Cole wasn't the only thing in his life that sucked. His brother and sister had moved into his house With Rod and Jeannie's seven kids, there were now ten people living in his three-bedroom apartment. Don't get him wrong, Jeff loved his family and every time he saw Rods three boys he had a great time playing with or taking them to the pool or the movies. It was the same with Jeannie's girls. Jessica and Robin were getting so big. They were in high school now and practically lived on their cell phone's talking about,

 "Guess what? Boys. I know one day those girls are going to drive their mother crazy. I thank god for Sam and Cara, they were still in grade school and they thought boys were yucky. That will give us four more years of peace.
As he drove, he saw three guys dressed like thugs hanging out in front of a run down two story ranch style house.  With a quick glance he realized he knew the dark-skinned Spanish guy, he had bought from before. With a nod, the guy started back towards the back of the house as Jeff parked. Leaving his wallet in the car, catting only what he thought he might need, Jeff took a deep breath and climb out the car and locked the door. Walking across the street, he watched as a kid in a red bandanna ran out to cars a and made two fast deals.
As he walked down in the driveway, he saw Peeto step out to where he could be seen, With his hand at his side, Jeff stuck out three fingers to let Peeto know what he wanted. Nodding his head, he ducked down and picked up a small bundle to pass to Jeff he dropped the money in an empty garbage can. The deal had been quick and done without the need for either of them to speak a word. Jeff could feel the rocks in the small bag. It felt right and he knew the coke would be good and worth the 2money. Relieved, Jeff did the circle around the house, then headed for the car.
As Jeff started the car, the radio came on with an emergency news bulletin. The background noise seemed a bit garbled. Women were screaming and you could hear the sound of a car screeching as it slammed into something.
"What the hell is going on?" Jeff thought to himself as he changed the station. The next newscaster was much calmer but he was reporting the same story. It seems there was an asteroid on the way. they said it would crash into the west coast but the landing didn't matter. the asteroid was the size of Manhattan Island. No one would escape this one.
As Jeff listened his thoughts went straight to Pasco county in Florida where the most important person In his life was living. After a huge fight, Peter Oliver had packed his bag and stormed out of his life. Jeff got up and walked to his dressing table and opened its top draw. He pushed away from the old Sabbath passes and picked up an upside down framed picture. Slowly he turned it over and stared down at the most handsome man he had ever seen. As Peter danced across the ballroom floor, Jeff had been snapping pictures of him. The smile on the handsome blond would have been enough to light the whole room. They were at the wedding of two of their best friends and Jeff had just asked Peter to marry him. The smile on Peter's face and the teardrop in his eye was all Jeff needed for and answer. He said yes of course. He said yes five times as they danced across the ballroom floor.
Honestly, that was an amazing day. They danced until 3 am that night, then they went back to the hotel and made love. Chris had sparkling blue eyes, and a smiled that could win his heart no matter where they were. His had the body of Apollo and the heart of Adonis. But sometimes he could be the most stubborn man on Earth. That was what had broke them up. Jeff couldn't remember what the argument had been about, but somehow it had destroyed them. Chris had moved out and Jeff went back to Jersey. But now that he thought about it, whatever it was, it didn't matter because Chris was more important and he would definitely suck it up and say it was his fault.
Jeff grabbed a backpack and stuffed some shorts and t-shirts in. He grabbed his wallet and cigarettes then looked at the 8 ball on the table. All he had to do was crush it, then pack it away, but it didn't seem important anymore. After grabbing off the table, Jeff was gone out of the room.
From his room, Jeff hurried down to the lobby. As he pushed his way through the staircase door, he saw the lobby was deserted. The was no one behind the desk, and there were no bellhops anywhere to be found He turned and headed into the hotel restaurant. There was a full. buffet set up but there was no one there to eat it.
As he looked around the dining room, Jeff saw a huge blue cooler sticking out from underneath the table. He pulled it out and took it into the pantry and filled it with cans of anything he thought might need. From the walk-in, he grabbed milk, eggs, and butter, some vegetables. From the freezer, he took hamburger meat, steaks, bacon, some hot dogs, pork chops, breakfast sausages. Now all he needed was some cookware that he found in the hotel kitchen. Set and loaded, he dragged his supplies out into the lobby to the front entrance. He knew there was no way his car would hold all this stuff, but he remembered there was a car dealership down the block on the corner.
After stashing his things behind the valet stand, Jeff took off out the hotel. He ran down the block past the liqueur store with its crashed in windows. Past the smoke shop and the movie theater to the corner where a lot sat with an assortment of cars and pickup trucks. Jeff looked around. He couldn't believe no one else had thought to grab some wheels. Maybe that was because there was someone here protecting the cars.
"Hello!" He called out. "Anybody here?"
"Just me." He heard from behind him. He heard that and the sound of a gun being cocked. "What can I do for you?"
"I need a truck," Jeff said as he turned around with his hands up to look at the stringy hair. "The blue one there if you don't mind."
"And how do you plan to pay for it?" He asked as he wiped his red nose.
Jeff couldn't believe he wanted money. Money was useless now with the asteroid on its way.
"Really?" Jeff gave him a look. Then something dawned on him. "How about this?"
Jeff reached in his pocket and pulled out the plastic wrapped white ball of cocaine. He held it out for the dealer.
"I'll trade you this for the pickup truck." He held it out and let it swing. "Its good stuff. You'll love it."
"Can I Try some?" The dealer asked with red eyes. He reached out to take the 8 ball. Jeff snatched it back away from him.
"You can have the whole thing if you agree to the trade." Jeff smiled. "Let's face it. We are all about to die when the asteroid hits. You should go find someone you love to spend these hours with."
The dealer looked at him with pain in his eyes. Jeff thought he saw tears, but the guy turned to his office and grabbed a set of keys off his board and tossed them to Jeff. With the keys in hand, Jeff tossed him the 8 ball and headed over to the SUV.
"Good luck." He called back as he started the vehicle and drove off the lot.
From Main Ave, Jeff drove down to Monroe and made a right. He drove down past the old Capital theater, where he had worked doing concerts for 10 years. On down the street past Hamilton Ave. Straight down past Columbia Ave and Hope to the entrance to RT 21 where he made a tight and was on his way south.
With the radio on, he got the latest update, the newsman said the asteroid was still coming, but there was a number of small chunks going to hit first. New York would be hit somewhere around 54th St and 8th. Jeff knew the area. That's where Studio 54 and the Ritz was located. Stepping on the gas, Jeff zipped through Clifton and Nutley. Down through Bellville and into Newark. From Newark traffic was busy. It was car to car and bumper to bumper. It took an hour for Jeff to get from the left lane to the right one where he could get off. He took an exit into Elizabeth where he had to drive through the city to get to Newark Airport. As he slid through traffic around the airport, he dodged stalled cars and people on feet rushing in to try and hijack his SUV. They beat at the side of his wheels as they beat at each other trying to get into the truck. Jeff gunned the gas knocking people out of his way as he pushed through the airport.
After the airport, I-95 took him down through Delaware and into Maryland. Around Baltimore, Jeff found the highway clogged with crashed vehicles. Someone took a heavy vehicle and ran it down through the left lane trashing somewhere near fifty cars. Making a quick right, Jeff avoided the traffic jam by taking a quick exit and driving along the city street to the next entrance. From there traffic was still busy but it moved at a pretty quick pace.                                   
As he entered 295, Jeff looked out to see fires burning all through DC. He could hear small explosions going off out in the city. The radio newsman reported riots running through the city. We're at the brink of disaster and all people could think to do get angry. Jeff didn't see the point. The asteroid wasn't the government's fault, so why get mad? There's nothing they could do.
From D.C. he drove south through Maryland and into Virginia. The roads were pretty bad. He passed pile up after pile up. There were people on foot walking North. Jeff wasn't sure where they thought they were going and he didn't have time for questions right now. After Virginia came North Carolina. This was the first area that was totally unpassable, so Jeff had a turn around and find another way south. After getting off the Turnpike, Jeff was in a city named Redwood. Now thats a funny name for a city. From the turnpike













not finished.